my world is coming to an end I feel.
The endless not studying for subjects..
The running away from enemies and friends..
I somehow am trying to get away from my life and be alone..
Being an extrovert this ain't possible..
So now I am suffering deeply and no one pretty much cares..
After all I'm that person who started this gap.
So many things happened.. Everytime I know graduation is at the corner I get these flashbacks of that painful mistake I made. And I still can forget it.
Somehow due to that incident I sort of swore to myself never to get a bestfriend. For I might break another friendship.
But that has brought me loneliness, despair, a willless soul in making. I really appreciate friends I made in my primary school years. I feel that they are here to guide me to the correct path.. Even though they aren't beside me during my secondary school life, I think they still know me better.. After all, I became a different person when I got into secondary school..
I really want to talk to someone but there isnt anyone I dare to approach.
My hopes are running thin. O levels are ending which means I might have less time with my friends in secondary school. And yes they are less significant but they are still friends.
I really hate this promise I made, my mistake can't be forgotten even though the victim has forgiven me.
I am a righteous guy, I go by my own principles and through these years of constant moral and civil education, I believe I have the correct values.
However, DETERMINATION AND PERSERVERANCE are two of the hardest to use. How can perservere to be determined when I have been insulted and brought down when I get a drive. My ears aren't sharp but sometimes my ears just become super sensitive and when words like 'retarded' 'useless' come in, it really makes an imapct. I might be the most sensitive guy out there but I don't show it.. If only I had a soulmate. It would be perfect.